Tuesday, April 05, 2011

The work fart

Hypothetical situation:

You share an office at work with one other person.  Your office mate is out of the room, but you don't know how long he'll be gone.  Maybe he went down the hall to ask someone a question and he'll be back any minute.  Maybe he's in a long meeting or even went to another building.  But you've got some gas building up and you'd like to let it out.  Your last fart was fairly stinky so you'd prefer not to let it out if your office mate is about to return.

What do you do?  How hard do you try to hold it in?  How long be for you give in and let it loose?


Premee said...

I just checked our approval and your bottom is not a regulated emission point, which means anything released from it is considered a 'fugitive' emission. Therefore, unless there is a health risk to persons in the area, my recommended course of action would be:
1. Give 'er, then open a window for five minutes, or
2. Hold it in, then go take a walk by the north side of the Acid Plant where the additive effects of your fugitive emission will go essentially unnoticed.

Alex said...

Ah, the Pit of Molten Sulphur. No one would notice a fart there.

But what makes you think this is about my farts? I said it's a hypothetical situation.

(Note to other readers: Premee is a co-worker of mine at a heavy industrial facility near Edmonton.)

Premee said...

Oh, you're quite right. I forgot it was a hypothetical situation.

The third option for this hypothetical person would be to ensure his/her officemate had hung out in Leach a lot, thereby killing numerous olfactory receptors, thereby making him/her immune to any gas being passed in a shared office.