When Cathy goes on call

My wife is doing her medical residency, and that means she has to go on call at times (ranging anywhere from not at all to a couple times a week, depending on which rotation she's on). And for a medical resident, "call" means being at the hospital for at least 24 hours straight, sleeping if she's not busy, until the pager goes off.

The evening before call can be a full evening. She'll have three meals during her time away and prefers not to buy them at the hospital, so she packs a bunch of food in the evening. Maybe I try to help her out where I can or maybe I try to get something else done. But however it goes, there's less time to sit or walk together and just enjoy each other's presence.

The next morning we both leave for work, but my work day is a normal length. I come home to a quiet house--not unusual even on a non-call day, but today it stays quiet. I make myself some supper and have nobody to share it with. Later, maybe I get some stuff done around the house, or I get together with friends, or I do some grocery shopping. I'm more of an evening person than Cathy is, so I may stay up later than I normally would if she's home. Maybe I waste time on the internet. Sometimes I stay up later than I should. I may be more of an evening person than she is, but I'm not a big night person.

I fall asleep alone, wake up in the morning, and go to work. I know that sometime this morning, she will get off work and come home. She probably only got a few hours of sleep. But she doesn't sleep well in the mid-morning, so she saves the rest of her sleep for the afternoon.

When I get home from work, she's probably asleep still. I go to our bedroom and give her a kiss and she starts to wake up. After she wakes up, she holds me tight and gives me a kiss. Together we make supper and have some time for some good conversation. One or both of us may go out for some evening activities, but regardless, we do have some quality, relaxing time together.

Absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

The obvious question

Dentist: How are you?

Me: Good. I guess the last time I was here, I wasn't married. I got married this year.

Dentist: Congratulations! Does your wife have a dentist?

Ironically named countries

I've been married for three weeks now, and it's going well. It's an adjustment, but it's a good adjustment. But today's topic isn't about marriage. So maybe I'll share more about marriage another time. But some information will remain private.

We haven't had a chance to go on a honeymoon yet, but we have one booked. After much mind-changing, we settled on Iceland. We're excited to go there. But today's topic isn't what we're going to do on our trip. No, that would be too normal.

I just have a comment about this satellite photo.

Who named these countries? They should really trade names?

2 more days...

...until I get married. Cathy has been back in Edmonton for two weeks, and it's been great having her here. I'm really looking forward to life together.

Online wedding invitations

As the wedding draws closer, I'd like to share some comments on one aspect of wedding planning: the invitations.

We decided to go the cheaper / more environmentally friendly / possibly easier route and do online invitations. We decided to use an online invitation service rather than just sending out an email ourselves, because those services can manage RSVPs and stuff. We figured Facebook invites would be too informal for a wedding. So we tried out a few other invitation services by sending Cathy and myself invitations to a sample event.

The first one we tried was Evite, because I'd heard of it before. This turned out to be the most annoying invitation website that we tried. When we replied to our invitation, it asked us to pick a password. It seemed to want all the guests to sign up for site memberships, but I think there was a small link allowing guests not to get a membership. Maybe there's a way for the event creator to disable this option, but I didn't go searching for it. I find it annoying when I'm pressured to sign up for a website (which is part of the reason this blog is on a service where you don't need a membership to leave comments), and we didn't want to annoy our guests, so Evite was out. They also have advertising on the invitations, which seemed tacky for a wedding invitation. We're trying to keep the wedding fairly simple and inexpensive, but it is still a much more significant event than an ordinary party.

Then we tried Pingg. Their free service is a lot less annoying than Evite. Guests don't get pressured into signing up. And you have the option of paying a small fee to remove the ads from the invitations.

Finally, we tried Sendomatic. They specialize in ad-free invitations, so their free service can only invite 10 guests per event. For their paid service, you have to pay based on the number of people invited. Like Pingg, they don't pressure guests into registering for their site. Overall, I think their invitations look a bit more elegant than Pingg's. On Pingg, you choose a dominant picture for your invitation, or upload your own. On Sendomatic, you choose a background image, and you can also upload an image that will appear over the background, above the text.

We decided to use Sendomatic, but I would not hesitate to recommend Pingg too. Either option is a lot cheaper and probably a lot less work than mailing invitations. And if some people on your invite list don't have email, you could print off a copy and mail it to them.

And now the downside of using a service like this: some email services will put the invitations in the spam folder. Fortunately, these services let you see which invitees have clicked on the link in their email to view the actual invitation. Then you can contact the people who haven't seen the invitation and remind them that there's an invitation in their email somewhere. You can also re-send the invitation (without paying an extra fee) if they already cleared out their spam folder. Contacting these people was probably at least half the work of doing online invitations, but probably still less work than managing the RSVPs from paper invitations.

So overall, I give electronic wedding invitations a thumbs up, but they have their annoying traits.

And as the wedding draws near, I'm counting my blessings. I've found someone who is fun to be with, a great friend and companion, beautiful, and who brings out the best in me. (That's four, but there are plenty more.)

Engaged!

If I've talked to you in person or on the phone since Sunday, or if you're my friend on Facebook, you may have already heard my news: I'm engaged! Cathy and I are planning to get married next summer.

Cathy is smart, funny, beautiful, athletic, understanding, and caring. She's my best friend and the love of my life. I'm thrilled to be able to spend the rest of my life with her. (I'd be lying if I claimed I wasn't nervous though. This is a big step!)

If you want to see some pictures from the proposal, I posted some on Facebook, along with the story of how it happened. You don't even need to be a Facebook member to see it!

Love isn't blind; it's myopic

"That's what you do when life hands you a chance to be with someone special. You just grab that brownish area by its points and you don't let go no matter what your mom says."
--Buster Bluth after he found love with his glasses off

What men really want

What has every man wanted for the last 3000 years?

It's not looks...

Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?
She is more precious than rubies.
Her husband can trust her,
and she will greatly enrich his life.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

She finds wool and flax
and busily spins it.
She is like a merchant’s ship,
bringing her food from afar.
She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household
and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.

She goes to inspect a field and buys it;
with her earnings she plants a vineyard.
She is energetic and strong,
a hard worker.
She makes sure her dealings are profitable;
her lamp burns late into the night.

Her hands are busy spinning thread,
her fingers twisting fiber.
She extends a helping hand to the poor
and opens her arms to the needy.
She has no fear of winter for her household,
for everyone has warm clothes.

She makes her own bedspreads.
She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.
Her husband is well known at the city gates,
where he sits with the other civic leaders.
She makes belted linen garments
and sashes to sell to the merchants.

She is clothed with strength and dignity,
and she laughs without fear of the future.
When she speaks, her words are wise,
and she gives instructions with kindness.
She carefully watches everything in her household
and suffers nothing from laziness.

Her children stand and bless her.
Her husband praises her:
“There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
but you surpass them all!”

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last;
but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
Reward her for all she has done.
Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

--Proverbs 31:10-31 (NLT)

It's not cooking, cleaning, or sewing ability...

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows whats best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes
I want a girl with the right allocation
Whos fast, and thorough, and sharp as a tack
Shes playing with her jewelry, shes putting up her hair
Shes touring the facility and picking up slack
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a loooooooooooooooong jacket

I want a girl who gets up early
I want a girl who stays up late
I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity
Who uses a machete to cut through red tape
With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass
She is fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack
Shes touring the facility and picking up slack
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a long, long jacket

Nanananananananananananananananananananananananananananana

I want a girl with a smooth liquidation
I want a girl with good dividends
At citi bank we will meet accidentally
Well start to talk when she borrows my pen
She wants a car with a cup holder arm rest
She wants a car that will get her there
Shes changing her name from Kiddy to Karen
Shes trading her MG for a white Chrysler Le Barron
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a loooooooooooooooooooooong
Jacket

Nanananananananananananananananananananananananananananana
--Cake

So what do these two ideal women have in common? Strong business sense.

The End.

Do you ever notice themes to certain years in your life? I half-jokingly called 2007 my year of worldly success. I started that year unemployed, living with my parents, and without a girlfriend. By the end of the year, I had a job, I owned a condo, and I had a girlfriend.

2008 seems to be the year of endings.

For the first time that I know of, a couple whose wedding I attended are now separated.

My girlfriend and I broke up (in February).

On more of a national and global scale, our economic growth has ended, for a while. Somebody even said, "We are not in a recession. We are not even in a depression. We are at the end of an era." I have no idea if they're right.

For the second time that I know of, a couple whose wedding I attended are now separated.

Recently, the Christian college I attended in 2000-2001 (Taylor University College) announced that it is closing next year. Its seminary will remain open.

Most of these things don't directly involve me, and I can't say that I regret the changes that do directly involve me. But thinking about all this stuff puts me in a bit of a melancholy mood.

The four most romantic words

"It's a minority government."
--Helena Guergis, a Member of Parliament from Ontario

With those four words, Helena Guergis convinced her fiance, recently defeated MP Rahim Jaffer, to get married that day. They went out, got rings, found a marriage commissioner, and got married. They had planned to get married on October 18, but called it off when the Prime Minister called an election. Although the election was over before the 18th, I bet it would've been hard to campaign and plan a wedding at the same time.

So they found a way to guarantee that an unexpected election (which can easily happen when there's a minority government) wouldn't interfere with their wedding. Congratulations!

Here's an article about it if you want more of the story.

Another interview

Want to get interviewed? Here's the idea:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better!
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

I interviewed Kate a while back, and now she's interviewing me. By the way, I also answered an interview from Elim last year, which you can read here. Here are my answers to Kate's questions:

1. You get a plane ticket that goes around the world. Like all great offers, it has a catch- you have to keep going in the same direction (so if you fly towards China, you can't suddenly turn around and decide to go to Japan), and you have to use it in a month. Where will you go?
Hmm. Tough one. Let's say a couple days in LA, a day in Seattle, 3 days in Australia, three days in Japan, 3 days in China, 2 days in Thailand or somewhere around there, 3 days in India, 2 days in Ethiopia, 2 days in Russia, 2 days in Israel, 2 days in France, 2 days in Britain, 2 days in Florida, and then a day in Manitoba, since it's close to home and I haven't been there in a very long time.

That's just a really quick list of some places I'd want to go, just thrown together. In reality, I think I'd prefer to spend more time in less places, but then I wouldn't get as much of my money's worth out of the plane ticket. Is it possible that I'd care so much about getting my money's worth that I'd choose a less pleasant, same-priced vacation just so I could say I got more flights for the same amount of money?

2. What was your favorite toy as a kid? Why?
I think I'll say Transformers or Lego. With Transformers I enjoyed turning one thing into another, and with Lego I liked building stuff and taking it apart, even if I built the same thing multiple times (the thing in the instruction book).

3. What are the 5 worst songs ever (in your opinion). Why?
This is the toughest question of the five. I think I'll have to list artists or albums, not specific songs. In no particular order, here are my picks:

• My grandma has a record by a German boy named Heintje or something like that. Just about anything on that record could be on this list. (Hmm. I just looked him up on Wikipedia and he's still making albums. I think my grandma must have his debut album.)
  
• Usually I can tolerate Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera, and maybe even like some of their music. But if I listen to an entire album of either of them, I'd put some of the songs on this list.
• Anything from P.O.D.'s early albums. It's basically yelling without rhythm.
• I Hope You Dance. The song has a good message, but it's cheesy, and at one summer job I was forced to listen to EZ Rock way too much, and I think that song was popular then. But I think that song is still popular on that station.
  
• The Song that Never Ends, written by Norman Martin. Using it in a painkiller commercial was genius though.

As I was working on this list, I thought of a few that deserve honourable mention, but they're so amusing I couldn't possibly put them on the actual "worst songs ever" list. Here they are:

• Old MacDonald by Frank Sinatra
• Yummy Yummy Yummy by Ohio Express
• David Hasselhoff's cover of Hooked on a Feeling - the video wins the Worst Ever Use of a Green Screen award
  

4. What's the most surprising thing you've learned in the last year?
It's easier to find a girlfriend at Hickfest than at Bible college. Actually, for me, maybe that's not so surprising. I didn't enter Bridal College seven years ago with much for relationship expectations.

5. If you lost any of your 5 senses, which would be the worst to lose and which would be the least problematic?
I think the sense of touch would be worst to lose. I probably don't think about that one as much as vision or hearing, but it's so essential. Without that I think I'd feel so detached from my environment, and it would be so easy to damage my body without realizing it. I've heard of somebody who was born without the ability to feel pain and she scratched out one of her own eyes before her parents figured out a way to fasten goggles to her face securely.

I think the least problematic one would be taste. As much as I'd hate to be without some of the pleasure of eating, my sense of smell would still give me a partial sense of taste. And outside of eating, the sense of taste really serves no purpose, unlike all the other senses.

Christmas

The week of Christmas started off stressful. About a week and a half earlier, my car broke down. It would've cost $500 to maybe get it running somewhat reliably, but there still would've been a major coolant leak in the head. So I decided not to get it fixed. I borrowed my parents' car for a couple days, then I spent the weekend in Calgary (I took the bus), and then I rented a car for a week. The next weekend, I picked out a car and I picked up the car on Christmas Eve. Meanwhile, I had some Christmas shopping to do.

The Cavalier and I had some good years together. She carried me 80,000 km, to various jobs, to Colorado and back, and to Fort McMurray and back quite a few times. Now I have a Neon (one of the newer ones, so it should be fairly reliable), and it has a manual transmission, so I'm getting lots of practice with that.

Once Christmas came, I was relieved. The urgent items were taken care of. I got to celebrate the birth of Jesus with a lot of my relatives, and my girlfriend (yes, I have a girlfriend now) spent a few days in Edmonton starting on Boxing Day. We had some quality time together and she got to meet lots of my relatives. They seem to get along well.

Later in the week, I got to see my friends who moved to Toronto a couple years ago. I've seen them a couple times since they moved, but this was their first time back to Edmonton since they moved.

I'm sure some new stresses will come soon, and I know there are some things I need to get done in the near future. But it's been a good break, and I really feel blessed to have all these people in my life.